I don’t know about you, but I feel like Ash Wednesday always creeps up on us. I mean, I seriously just watched my neighbors take down their Christmas tree a couple days ago. Now in their defense I think they may be snow birds to somewhere like, I don’t know.. Florida. I guess our harsh Texas winters can be too much.. (Insert Scarlett O’Hara eyebrow raise). No judgement here. I love Christmas just as much as the next person, but it is March. They were past that awkward point of you still haven’t taken it down? To wow, aren’t you a little early?
Wednesday morning as I was making my bed with O “helping” me, my mom FaceTimed. O answered the phone excitedly, “Hi Nana!”
“Good morning O!” Nana said.
“Nana, what happened to your head? Are you alright?” asked O concerned.
“Oh yes honey, I’m fine I just went to church early this morning. I’m sure you’ll go tonight.” said Nana.
O looked at me with big eyes. Now mind you, she has an overactive imagination like her mama. I could just see all the questions formulating in her little mind getting ready to cascade out of her mouth. Sometimes I wish I was a day drinker. Do you know the average toddler asks 288 questions a day? That means I probably tell about 200 lies a day.
I took the phone from O so my poor mother wouldn’t pass out from motion sickness trying to talk to my daughter. Most of the time when you try and FaceTime my children, it looks like you are watching the Blair Witch Project. You get great shots of their noses, sometimes with a lovely booger dangling around. You will see my ceiling or their feet as they run off with you. You may even hear a toilet flush as they try to go potty and talk to you, talk about multitasking! And if you are super lucky they will spin around in a circle with you so you can feel like you are at an amusement park for free!
I love my morning check in’s with my mom. I’m almost 40 and I think I talk to her about 9 times a day. After we hung up, O turned to me and began the interrogation.
“Her head is dirty mom! Why isn’t she washing her face? Why did church do that to her? Does she know?” asked O sternly.
“Yes love she knows, I’m not just letting Nana walk around with dirt on her face.” I said. “On Ash Wednesday Christians put ashes on our heads to help us remember that we are dust and to dust we shall return.” By the horrified look on her face I realized that was way too deep. Before we could start a theological debate I continued. “Ash Wednesday is the first day of Lent, which is when we practice self-restraint and abstention until Easter.”
She just stared at me with confused eyes. “Okay sister, basically you pick out something you want to give up. Food, a bad habit, or you can do something kind. Basically you’re doing something intentional for Jesus. What would you like to do?”
She sat thoughtful for a moment and said “How about cookies and candy?!”
Cookies and candy, huh? Well at this moment I can come clean and explain to her what she is doing or I could do to her what my father did to me at her age, which I still hold a grudge dad. I could let her think that we are having a party a church. I loved parties and one for Jesus had to be super special, so naturally I suggested cookies, cupcakes, candy, juice and pop! When we got home that evening I asked for a cookie, but instead I had a harsh “come to Jesus” moment with my dad. So do I come clean or not? To avoid long periods of screaming and crying later, because that’s frowned upon for a 37 year old, I tell her the truth.
“That’s fine, but you do realize that you are giving these things up? Meaning, no more cookies and candy until Easter.” I said.
She sat thoughtfully for a moment and had a look of regret. This look totally reminded me of the time we had lunch with my mother at Applebee’s. O loves vegetables and one particular day she decided that she wanted a side of broccoli with her meal. I had a proud mama moment, so I let her go ahead and order it. When the food came out, O looked from her plate to my mothers. My mother had a nice side of fries that caused O great remorse. O hung her head and whispered, “What have I done??!” I think I spit out my Diet Coke.
“What? Wait!! Okay.. then you can take all the fruit. I don’t want it.” Said O.
“Such a sacrifice O.” I said sarcastically
O’s smile widened and she ran out of the room. You remember that moment when your mom told you she hoped you’d have one just like you someday? Well that day is here for me, times three. I guess I can stop buying fruit and throwing it away now.
The Fleeing Mommy 